Drunk and Disorderly and I don't understand people.

It's Monday. The first Monday I've worked in three weeks and it's making me cranky. (Spoiled, I know.)

And even though I would have loved to throw my alarm clock at the wall and finally, finally, be able to ignore all the demands and responsibilities that are life, I still got up (on time) and began my routine.

I brush my teeth, pee, grab a bottle of water and scrunch up my face when the water hits my toothpaste-sensitive throat (you know what I'm talking about).

Skipping ahead a few steps, it's now 8:15 and I'm getting dressed, impressed with myself to be leaving on time. I slip on my jacket, grab my lunch and I'm out the door.

Things are definitely starting to look up, even for a Monday. There's no traffic. And the sun is shining. And my boss is off today, which means there's the possibility of leaving early. Yes, things are definitely looking up.

I get to work, grab some coffee, and head upstairs. I see people. I smile. I say good morning. I chat with some co-workers and begin my work.

Now fast forward an hour. I've been incredibly productive for a Monday, but my tummy's grumbling so I ask a co-worker if she wants anything from the cafeteria and head downstairs.

Stopping in the restroom, I take care of some business and am washing my hands when I look at myself in the mirror and realize the collar of my jacket has been sticking up haphazardly on one side all this time.

No, this isn't embarrassing. At least, it isn't until I start thinking about all the people who have stopped to chat and look at me this morning.

I don't understand people. Not one of them could have said "Hey, your collar's sticking up"??? I mean, I could kind of understand if it was a booger or something. Sure, even I would have a hard time telling someone they have a slimy green monster hanging from their nose, but a collar?! You can't give a girl a heads up that she's walking around looking like she got dressed in a drunken fumble?

Geez.